Just want to have a good time, keep you out my mind

What’s up party people?

“Co-operation + you doing nothing = success”

That’s the approach I’m forced to take sometimes, whether it’s group assessments or basketball, there are just certain situations where a group must put the greater good on one’s back and let that individual carry everyone across the finish line. Am I dick for doing that? Well, I prefer doing well and winning over failing and losing, so if I’m a dick for favouring the former options than a dick I am.

Of course, people opposed to this will claim that I just want the glory, that I don’t let individuals shine alongside of me. Fcuk that, we all shine if we do well, and if I simply write better, present better and speak better than you, I’m going to do just that. The purpose of all group activities is collective success, and the correct utilisation of whatever tools you have at your disposal. If I’m sitting in your toolshed, you put me to god damn use, there is no point using a broken hammer when I’m the best at nailing things.

There may be no I in team, but there’s an I in win.

 

I need a photo like that. Pronto.

By the way, for the single digit number of people that care, I am now free of exams!

Admittedly I only had two, but it’s a pretty nice feeling to have left my studies behind me for the year.

Anywho, on to the next one:

The Impression ’00

I haven’t written about HER in a while, mostly due to the fact that everything was just so long ago and I’ve pretty much wrapped everything up. Once you’ve drawn the line connecting point A to point B, there is no point adding to the story anymore.

Except, I’ve just realised that I never even drew point A.

So here it is, Point A of the story.

Sitting right at the back, covered by other students bodies as they walked around looking for their writing books, was nine year old Isaac who was waiting for the crowd to subside before he went to grab his own book. Eventually, the fourth grade class all settled back into their seats and began scrawling everything that was posted on the blackboard. Isaac was also writing, not as neat as the people next or around him, but definitely a lot faster.

Which is probably why he was one of the only kids to notice one of the school office ladies walk into the classroom with a girl beside her that he had never seen before. She had a round face, bright red cheeks and a scared look upon her face. She was dressed in the vibrant red of Campsie Public, even her pants had the school logo imprinted. Isaac glanced at his own pants and wondered where his mother had gotten them.

He watched as she walked to the front of the classroom towards his teacher, a few other kids had also noticed the intrusion.

Teacher: Everybody put your pencils down and say hello to our new student from New Zealand, say hello to *****.

Isaac didn’t bother saying anything, he glanced at his friend next to him and noticed the grin.

Isaac’s friend: Dude, she’s kinda chubby.

Isaac: I guess

(Editor’s note: Who would’ve thought?)

Until next time folks! Stay classy!

One regret from yesterday, that just seems to grow with time

What’s up party people?

Isaac: I have a virus

S: You do? *Backs away*

Isaac: No you idiot, a computer virus

In a cruel sense of sadistic irony, I have been struck down by a fever that has obviously been watching way too many ninja movies as it came out of seemingly nowhere. Admittedly I was a bit restless yesterday and found it difficult to at full speed, but it never crossed my mind that my body had been burnt out once again. I’ve deliberately been taking it easy so that I would be at peak fitness levels during the home run stretch of the semester but apparently I have overestimated my abilities once again and now am bedridden with a malfunctioning netbook computer.

Oh well, though I’m a bit under the weather, my mood is still nothing but sunshine and lollipops.

Nice. Very nice.

Anywho, on to the next one:

The fans have spoken, and by sheer numbers alone, it appears that my editor is infinitely more popular than myself. So I thought I’d hand over the reigns to him again and let him write about something he’s been thinking about for a little while now.

Advice to Isaac.

Editor here.

So Mr Lai has finally come to his senses and realised that his mediocre writing ability is not enough to keep his own friends entertained, better late than never, but never late is better. Should have realised it kid, now it’s up to me to save his little blog from extinction. So as Mr “I have a fever” puts his feet up, I’ll be writing something that he correctly stated has been on my mind for a while. He spends a lot of time looking back, he’s a rather reminiscent fellow, but to quote Inception, he does not want to be an old man filled with regret waiting to die alone.

So, I thought I’d write a couple of short paragraphs to his former incarnations, a little advice to keep his head in check. And to remind him how he got to where he was today, understand? No, but that’s ok.

Dear Isaac ’95

Hey there little buddy, yeah I know your name is Anthony but trust me, you’ll like Isaac a lot better. I see you’ve met your older sister, I know she seems mean but she’ll mean a lot to you in the future, and she loves you buddy, don’t be too angry about all the things she’s changing. It’s about time you learnt some discipline, and yes she is a bit lazy at times, but covering her ass will make you a better dude as you grow up. Oh and by the way, do not swallow that 20c piece you find on the floor you’ll find in July, you’ll regret it.

Dear Isaac ’00

Hey man! Long time without hearing from you, do you like school? I am well aware that you still lie awake at night waiting for the day you can get out of the place but believe me when I say that you’ll look back upon these days fondly, even if Chinese can be a bitch sometimes, you’ll feel a lot better about yourself in a few years when a tonne of your friends can no longer speak effective Chinese. And by the way, I know you’re special, you’ve been told that your whole life, but please tone down the arrogance, there is no need to show up your classmates in class, there will be a time where that confidence will serve you well, but not when you’re in fourth grade. And oh yeah, talk to HER. Don’t just admire her from a far, becoming friends with her will be a great experience buddy.

Dear Isaac ’02

What up partner? First off, stop saying sh*t on a stick, it’s not funny. Secondly, good job dancing with HER at the farewell, those were some sweet ass dance moves for an eleven year old. I’m very proud of you for having become friends with her, but dude, tell her how you feel. I know you’re eleven, but think of what a cool story it’ll be if you actually capitalised upon this foundation? And yes, I know I’m using bigger words now, but you get them don’t you? There’s no need to pretend to be dumb with your friends, there’s a reason why the teachers keep assigning you too better classes. And by the way, she’s going to St George. Think about it kid.

Dear Isaac ’05

My man! What’s been happening? That’s a rhetorical question by the way, I know exactly what’s been happening. It’s been a tough year, I know you feel shaken, but in time when you look back, you’ll realise that this betrayal is one of the defining moments of your teenage life. You’re angry, lonely and frustrated, but better things will happen in time. And yes, change your name sooner so people will get used to it, being called Anthony is going to tick you off from here on out.

Dear Isaac ’08

Isaac, how do you do? Nice badge you got there, I’m really proud of you man, even if the folks aren’t. Not everyone can say that they managed to juggle the responsibilities of being school captain and the HSC in the same year, I really am man. Oh by the way, she won’t last, but enjoy the time you guys have together, but don’t take her sh*t about being from a lesser school. It’s been a big year for you, and you made a lot of mistakes. Please stop spending so much money on other people, so much that you’re even thinking about missing the Kanye West concert, it’s KANYE WEST man, please, please, please stop spending money on stupid things. Save up. And don’t buy the car, trust me. Another thing, when she calls you, go out and see her, or you’ll regret it.

Dear Isaac ’09

What’s up party person? Don’t like the line? Oh you will. Prepare for the best year of your life man, and keep your head on straight at all times, don’t get caught up in the heat of the moment. And remember when I told you to save money? It better be earning interest right now man, you’ll need it. Keep working hard at Uni man, I know you feel like you have a lot to prove to yourself, just don’t push yourself over the edge. It gets worse from here, but the sky is darkest before the dawn. Oh and she’s a great girl, I know you’ve noticed, but she’s not the right fit for you, and she won’t change to fit your needs, she doesn’t have to to do that and no matter how hard you try you won’t penetrate her fortress of solitude. But she can be a great friend, don’t screw it up.

Oh and I know the crew you’re hanging out with is fun, but keep in touch with everyone else. They watched you grow and they love you too man, don’t let them float away.

And I’m glad you ditched the wrist band, the tan line was ridiculous.

Peace out man.

Until next time folks! Stay classy!

Rockin’ like a pro wit’ it girl

What’s up party people?

“Aren’t you curious?

What it’d be like with us?

We’ve been living in a friend zone building up trust,

Possibilities, maybe you and me

Could be writing on the wall, could be destiny”

Recently I’ve had to deal with a few questions regarding my personal lack of love life, especially with the concept of being lead on. Personally, I don’t think it’s possible for someone to lead you on without me succumbing to their moves and interpreting them as moves. So I try not to read too much into what anything says or does, because: “I know you say you love me girl, but you probably tell that shit to everybody, so I just don’t believe you.“

Just finished reading The Secret History by Donna Tartt, it’s a novel looking at the lives of six college students in Hampden and how they deal with a murder in their own group. It was an absolutely fascinating read and very different to what I am accustomed with reading. I would recommend it to whoever was looking for something a little different, and do not read it if  you’re looking for a typical college story, you won’t get it.

Anywho, on to the next one:

Owned ’01

Look, when you meet someone back when you were nine years old, and she still has a spot in your mind ten years later, she’s a very special individual. Due to all those years we spent together in our formative years, I still have so many stories I have yet to tell, fragments of memories that I still recollect very fondly whenever I have the chance to. And yes, I am talking about HER once again (Editor’s note: He has had no idea what to write for the past half hour).

So once again, this is a story about her.

Fifth grade, Isaac was in Tasker Park for sport on a Friday afternoon. He wasn’t a part of PSSA so he enjoyed the friendly competition amongst his classmates, the sport of the day was soccer. Isaac darted around, following the ball like all kids who didn’t really understand the finer points of how to play soccer. Eventually, the kids in Isaac’s classes figured out something called spacing and a competitive game of soccer began brewing.

Isaac was darting around quite quickly, making accurate passes to teammates in good scoring position, unluckily for young Mr Lai, his teammates were kicking aimlessly. People were getting frustrated, so someone decided to take over.

And no, it wasn’t Isaac. It was HER. A fine athlete in her own right, she started dominating the ball and quickly scored three times in a row. However, no one else on her team even got a chance to kick the ball around and Isaac noticed his team’s frustration.

He pulled her aside:

Isaac: Dude, that’s not the right way to play the game!

Girl: Well, do you see anyone else scoring goals?

It felt like a metaphorical punch in the face

Isaac went quiet, and as soon as he got the ball, he passed it to her very, very quickly.

And yes, she scored her fourth goal.

Until next time folks! Stay classy!

I just can’t seem to get out of this slump

What’s up party people?

“My friends keep telling me,

Just let it go now,

I said I’m trying man,

I just don’t know how”

Currently in UNSW library, I must say it has been a very disappointing day in terms of potential female talent. UNSW has better get it’s act together, or I’m gone next year in search of greener pastures (Editor’s note: Just kidding, I’m not going to leave)

Frustration seems to be something I have a huge supply of stored within myself. I’m just very dissatisfied with a lot of situations I currently have going on, some more precarious than others. Maybe it’s due to the fact that I have incredibly high standards and an almost compulsive desire for things working out exactly as I intend to, I’m just frustrated.

Yes, sexually too. Shut up.

Anywho, on to the next one:

Don’t matter ’00

Look, though looks aren’t the most important thing when it comes to love, it is essential when it comes to attraction. Someone easy on the eyes will obviously given a bit more attention to let their personality (Editor’s note: Or lack there of) to shine through and maybe get some love juice flowing through your veins. It’s a lot harder for someone whose not attractive to be able to have that platform, and even then it’s difficult.

Now, I’m no Brad Pitt (Editor’s note: Duh, you’re Chinese) so I know what it’s like to find it hard to become more than invisible. I have other means though, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I have a rather unique laugh that seems to draw attention to me, and once I’m bathed in the spotlight, I let my wit and charm free and am able to choose what heartstrings I want to play upon.

Anywho, this is a story of back when I didn’t have that option, and yes it features HER.

Fourth grade, our young protagonist Isaac Lai is at Campsie Library with a few of his best friends. They were just talking and shaking their Digimon, no troubles in their young minds to get them down, just enjoying life as any threesome of nine year olds would. As they were talking, one of Isaac’s friends’ suddenly had a serious expression their face

J: Hey Anthony

Isaac: Yeah?

J: You know what I heard the other day here?

Isaac: No, what did you hear?

His facial expression went from serious to grave, Isaac was sure he had something bad to tell him, a foreboding feeling suddenly washed over him.

J: Well, I was walking past a table and ***** was talking to some of her friends, and she said that “I kinda like Isaac, too bad he’s ugly”

Isaac smirked slightly, feigning the arrogance he had yet to discover and said something along the lines of he didn’t care or so what. It was just something some girl had said about him to her friends, no biggie right?

He didn’t have dinner that night.

No appetite whatsoever, a scowl in place of the familiar nine year old smile.

 

 

Something along those lines

 

Until next time folks! Stay classy!

 

 

 

Still too busy looking back

What’s up party people?

“I know way too many people here right now that I didn’t know last year,

Who the fcuk are y’all?

I swear it feels like the last few nights we’ve been everywhere”

An excerpt from Drake’s new single off of Thank Me Later, his highly anticipated first album. I am looking forward to it just as much as the day I can finally recommence drinking awesomeness in a bottle that is V.

Got around to watching Alice in Wonderland yesterday, I must say, I was highly disappointed with it. There were actually times in which I was falling asleep and I was perfectly fine and wide awake prior to the movie. Sure there were highlights, such as Helena Bonham Carter’s portrayal of the Red Queen, and visually it was the best movie I’ve seen since Avatar. Overall though, it was a huge letdown for me, you can do better than that Tim Burton.

Why the hell would you mess with Anne Hathaway's face? Why?

Anywho, on to the next one:

The Handshake ’02

Look, it’s 2010. And I am well aware of that fact, but sometimes, it is essential to look back to know which path to take in the future. Several of my situations when it comes to females always seem  to have a bit of deja vu to them:

“Oh man, another gold digger”

“Oh snap, I’m on the hook again”

“Oh wow, she really wants me”

There are certain things that just seem to be put on repeat when it comes to girls, and over the years I have learnt to read them as easily as a seven year old would be able to read the Twilight saga and realise how poorly written it is.

However, there is one entire situation that has not been replicated. And honestly, I don’t think it will ever be touched in terms of impact.

You know who I’m talking about.

This is another one of those stories.

Campsie Public School is the setting, and our young hero Isaac is in the last year of his tenure at the small public school. He was set to receive an award at the weekly award ceremony that the school held. Problem is that, SHE would be the one presenting awards, and he was nervous about how he was supposed to act once they were both on stage.

He liked her very much, she was an eleven year old’s idea of love, but he couldn’t stand to put himself at risk with all his boys watching.

She was on stage, in front of the microphone, her eyes surveyed the crowd, slight smile on her face.

Girl: Anthony Lai

Isaac stood up, walked slowly towards the stage, his best poker face was the mask currently on his face. She saw him coming and smirked slightly whilst cocking her head to the side. Isaac returned the expression; almost an exact replica.

She gave him the award, and extended her right hand. He took the award, and extended his own hand.

They looked into each other’s eyes, and began squeezing as if to break each other’s fingers.

Until next time folks! Stay classy!

Goodbye, now applaud

What’s up party people!

Happy new year folks! May 2010 bring you as much joy as 2009 brought me, and hopefully some added happiness, euphoria and all that other good stuff on top. There is so much to look forward to, and i can not wait to start my multiple challenges and conquests.

It’s going to be beyond legendary.

So how’d I ring in the new year? I decided to head to a place called Balls Head, and no it is not a homosexual nudist beach, it’s a very nice spot near Waverton and the view was absolutely brilliant. Big shout out to Jennifer Eir for finding the location and gathering a bunch of my bros to remind me of the most fundamental rule in all of mankind;

“Bros before hoes”

Why? Cause girls are like buses, miss one, next fifteen one coming (Editor’s note: Just kidding girls, you know i love you).

My favourite shot of the night

Anywho, on to the next one:

The Conclusion ’07

Throughout my blogging tenure, i have constantly teased my loyal readers about THE girl.

Look, when i first started liking her, i was what, 10-11 years old? It’s hard to describe my mindset and feeling back then, but i remember some moments where i was just a flutter. It was the most innocent of affection, no thoughts of lust, just pure longing. I’ve never believed in the concept of the one (Editor’s note: Other than Neo in The Matrix of course) but if i had to point at one of the girls that have occupied space in my old heart, i’d point my index finger in her direction.

So, how’d it all end? How did all these seemingly random events over seven years conclude indefinitely? Was it something epic? Did Isaac do something so romantic he had Romeo calling him from the grave asking tips?

Well he tried, this is the final story.

As you may recall, Isaac sacrificed a chance to see her due to one of the most perplexing decisions in the history of the world.

It was  unexplainable, even in hindsight he struggles to say exactly why he decided not to head out.

The days that followed were rough. Nothing new had happened, but his decision haunted him, it stayed in the background like a stalker, just lingering, reminding him of what he had or had not done. Eating became optional, showers were extended and sleep was lying in bed, eyes wide open staring at the unforgiving ceiling.

Then it hit him. He knew what he had to do.

The next day at school, he located his ever reliable best friend Salt.

I: Salt, let’s go to Newcastle

S: What?

He needed to conclude the chapter, see her once again, enjoy a last moment and let it go.

Salt agreed, they planned the trip, it was all good to go.

Until his reality just set in. She had a boyfriend, he had every girl in the world.

It had been years.

Though it had been tough, his life was pretty good if he really took a look at it.

She had moved on.

A fleeting moment was all he required, so had he.

And though it would have been great to see her, his memories of her were more than enough, everything he had done that was even slightly associated with her, every conversation, every sheepish grin, smile and laugh.

He had it all, closure had been achieved.

And he hadn’t even boarded a train to Newcastle.

Until next time folks! Stay classy!

Why’d you have to wait

What’s up party people?

Had most of the extended family over at my house for an unexpected Christmas dinner last night, it was pretty cool catching up with everyone, especially my cousin Willie. He’s the next Yao Ming, the kid is already bigger and taller at me at the tender age of fourteen. It’s absolutely absurd.

There was a conversation at the dinner table that i’d like to document. The entire family was seated, eating and speaking heartily about whatever came to mind. Naturally, due to the fact that i was the most valuable asset on the table, my mother and father spoke about me glowingly, rubbing my excellent results in the faces of several family friends who were in attendance.

Even though i’m a cocky son of a bitch, i still felt rather embarrassed that the spotlight was firmly glowing on me at this moment. My aunt piped up and said that i better take care of cousin Willie when i made it big. I smirked, and said:

Isaac: Willie won’t need my help, he’ll be even more successful than me in the future

Everyone began laughing, one aunt even said that the only way he’d do better than me was in an eating contest. I glanced at Willie. You see, if i was in his situation, i’d make sure to remember this moment, use it as motivation, and i’d also have a glare imprinted on my mug.

Willie was grinning sheepishly, almost in resignation.

Maybe he’ll develop that killer instinct some other day.

I just hope it's not the wrong killer instinct

Anywho, on to the next one:

Searching For You ’07

I only have two more stories to tell all of you about HER. This is the second last one, and perhaps the most crucial in bringing all the stories together.

I have mentioned previously that we stopped talking after my stupid mistake of never calling her back. This is the story, of how we reconnected after all these years.

It was an uneventful day, being my usual gung ho self, telling every girl she the one for me, when i wasnt even planning to call. I suddenly struck up a conversation with Kingsgrove North High School’s MVP Un-ai Jo.

Un-ai: Hey Isaac, did you hear about *****

My eyes widened.

Isaac: No, what happened?

Un-ai: Well, i was talking to James, and he told me that ***** isn’t doing too well. Apparently she’s really sick and suffering from Anorexia

Isaac: Oh

My heart sank. I knew i had to speak to her and find out whether she was ok.

I got home and began getting in touch with all her old friends as her old phone numbers no longer worked. Her friends told me that she had since moved and changed schools and that they hadn’t heard from her in a while. I scoured social network sites looking for any sign of her, my sense of worry was overwhelming me.

I didn’t eat much, nor sleep very well.

I told Salt about what i had heard and she helped me search vigilantly.

This search stretched from a day, to two, to a week, to two.

One day, i tried MySpace, typing in her full name.

Amazed, there she was. Well the name was her’s, the profile pic was her too.

And she had hotted up.

I sent her a message, to see if actually was her, i needed the verification.

It was.

I added her new email on MSN and we spoke for hours on end. It turns out that she had never been sick and that what i had heard were merely unfound rumours. She was once again a part of my life. I was so happy that i spent the rest of the day listening to “This is Why I’m Hot.”

Until next time folks! Stay classy!

Shawty said she really feelin’ me

What’s up party people?

“It’s hard, but it’s fair.”

Quote extracted from an excellent biography on my main man Michael Jordan.  Isaac Lai’s newest challenge is proving to be a lot more difficult than expected, but he relishes this, he craves it, the reward will be infinitely more rewarding as this difficulty level is maintained and perhaps increased. Game on life, i want this sh*t forever man.

Random tidbit. Girls who wear NBA jerseys are a massive turn on for me for some reason, maybe it’s cause  i love girls who have a keen interest in basketball and can have a conversation with me about the sheer brilliance of the NBA and not just about partyin’ and fashion. Oh and don’t get me started with girls rockin’ Air Jordans, that’s just too much. It’s like Pho and Sushi served during the same meal, it’s too much awesomeness.

Touch my body

Anywho, on to the next one:

Really? ’02

Ah primary school. The term ignorance is bliss was truly in play back in our formative years, though we still have no idea what’s ahead, it was even worse back in the day. Not that I cared all that much, i was happy playing handball with the guys, playing gamecube on weekends, and making sure you know who didn’t know i liked her.

It’s funny looking back at how carefully we protected our crushes’ identity, i remember being swarmed by girls who wanted me to divulge the secret. I remember having a really awkward conversation with my boy Mikey about why we liked he girls we liked:

Michael: So, why do you like her?

Isaac: Well, she’s really pretty

Michael: Yeah i like ***** cause she’s really pretty

Isaac: Oh, and she’s smart too!

Michael: Agreed, agreed

Anywho, my year six class had dance practice in the hall one day. I had no idea why dance was compulsory but it was, i slept walked through most of the routines as i was yet to develop my incredibly seductive moves at the age of eleven. Anywho, i was walking towards the door when my boy Albert (Editor’s note: What up Trebla!) stopped me. He had something he wanted to tell me:

Albert: Hey Ant

Isaac: What’s up?

Albert: Well, ***** likes you

Isaac: Oh really?

I do need to remind y’all this was before i became a universally recognised sex symbol, so girls liking me was an extremely rare occurence. I had no idea how to deal with it, come on, how many eleven year old boys know what to do when told a girl they like likes them back? (Editor’s note: I don’t give a crap about Diddy trying to lose his virginity at ten, i didn’t even fully understand the concept of sex back then)

Anywho, i know y’all are frustrated that i can never seem to wrap up this story involving said girl. I promise though, you will all understand soon enough.

Until next time folks! Stay classy!

I’m the one that’s lost the view

What’s up party people?

I have spoken to a number of people this month about how they’ve felt about this year, majority have indicated that it was ok, far from brilliant but not worthy of too much complaint. Another common sentiment was that it passed by way too quickly. For me? It’s been a hell of a long year, don’t get me wrong, i hate do repeat myself but this really has been the best year I’ve ever had, but part of its charm was that it was so long, allowing me to cherish every moment.

Here’s a few statistics for my mathematical friends:

- I’ve had TWO jobs this year

- I’ve dyed my hair FOUR times

- Since legally being able to purchase scratchies, my scratchie debt is currently EIGHT dollars

- As of right now, i’ve posted One hundred and fifty one blog posts.

Jesus, i am the Kobe Bryant of this blogging game. Debatable, but so is the theory of Evolution Mr. Darwin.

I miss the number eight Mr Bryant

Anywho, on to the next one:

The Wrong Decision ’07

For the past month, i have been pretty cryptic when it comes to my Isaac Chronicle flashbacks. I’ve left a few hints in SOME posts that have had my loyal readers questioning me, bombarding me with questions, whilst i grin and preach for patience. All shall be revealed some day.

Today, is not that day. However, another piece to the puzzle shall be thrown to you dear readers. And this is a big piece.

It was a rather forgettable day in the life of Isaac, he was in his backyard shooting fade away jumpshots at a regular clip, trying to be the best basketball player he could possible by. And judging by his absymal performance, he wasn’t going to be an NBA superstar by any means. The kid had a relentless drive though, not stopping until he could hit it consistently from the position he had camped upon for the past half an hour. Eventually, he could hit the shot barely even looking.

Satisfied, he headed back into the house. His phone went off, new text message received.

It was from HER:

“Hey Isaac! How are you? I was just wondering if you still lived in Campsie, ’cause im here now, would love to see you.”

He stood rooted to the spot, mouth open slightly, eyes bulging as if he had been unexpectedly kicked in the crotch. Regaining motion in his body, he quickly grabbed the home phone to call her back.

It started ringing.

Once,

Twice,

Three times.

Girl: Hello?

Isaac: Hey, it’s me

Girl: I know, what’s up?

Isaac: Well, not much, um, i moved

Girl: Oh, where’d you move to?

Isaac: Strathfield

Girl: Oh, is that far?

Isaac: Sort of

Girl: Guess i won’t be seeing you today

Isaac: Yeah, sorry about that

Girl: It’s ok

They hung up shortly afterwards. Feeling quite numb and hollow, Isaac decided to have a shower. The water flowed out of the pipes and onto Isaac, he felt nothing, his mind on overdrive. The phrase “WTF?” came up at the frequency of a pop up on the internet, what the fcuk was he doing?

She was a short bus ride away, and he was at home.

Why didn’t he go?

That night, he heard a new song entitled Away by Jared Lee, it was a simple yet beautifully haunting song, played on piano

And i’m trying to live without you,

And its hard to achieve when you’re not here

I go on, but im thinking about you

Everyday, away

He put the song on repeat, for three hours.

It was the closest he’d come to crying in years.

Until next time folks! Stay classy!

My efforts come to no avail

What’s up party people?

There are times where i’m wandering around, whether it be on the street, shopping centre or some other public area and i’d just notice the oddest couples in terms of composition. Whether it be someone extremely tall with someone whose height challenged, someone with an extremely happy expression coupled up with someone with a scowl on their face and my personal favourite: extremely hot asian girls with dishy Indian guys (Editor’s note: He’s being sarcastic).

It is then that i start to speculate how these people even got together in the first place, all the cliches could apply here:

- “Opposites attact”

But what about the need for commonalities and relatedness?

- “Different is good”

So is having similar interests

- “Need for citizenship”

Oh, i guess this one makes sense

Sigh, i do wish some couples would drop the facade though. Y’all should’ve split up years ago instead of tormenting those around you and waking 18 year old sex gods in the morning via verbal warfare that would get an R-18+ rating in any civilised country. Diu.

Anywho, on to the next one:

Dreaming of you ’02

After doing psychology all year, I have come to learn that dreams have very little meaning at all. After saying that though, it’s still fun to read into them, and some of the underlying messages people believe to be in their dreams are great conversation starters. I’ve had a lot of memorable dreams/nightmares; the infamous impostor Superman nightmare, being the leader of the Fantastic Four, jumping off a cliff then sprouting out angel wings. That’s some legendary sh*t, or the basis of superhero satire.

Jessica Alba as the Invisible Woman? Really?

However, there was dream that i still carry around with me, because like most of my dreams, it never came true. Even if i wanted it to.

I had this dream back in year six, i dreamt of an older me. Taller, better hair, slightly more appealing visually (Editor’s note: ok i guess that part came true) i was sitting in Anzac Park flanked by two mates. I don’t remember who, but i’m pretty sure it was two dudes out of my CPS crew.

We were laughing at a joke i had just made, then we all suddenly turned towards a footpath, three girls were walking towards us. And dream Isaac’s heart began thumping at an increased rate, i knew that our girlfriends were coming. They smiled warmly at us, love glowing in their eyes.

I got ready to stand up, give a hug, maybe a simple hello kiss.

And then i stacked it, and with a jolt i was snapped out of my sleep too. I realised i had kicked the wall adjacent to my bed as dream Isaac had stacked it.

So, you’re probably wondering why i would want that of all dreams to have come true.

Well, that girl i was preparing to say hello to was HER.

Until next time folks! Stay classy!